The Psychology of Shopping and Decluttering the House

Indulge me today; I need it!



I came across this 3 year old photo while cleaning up some files on my iMac recently and thought I'd share it with you. It looks pretty much the same but I am decluttering the house and the dining room has lost a lot of stuff in that cabinet in the background. I'm being brutal in giving stuff to friends and sending 4 truckloads—so far—of stuff to one of the local thrift stores.



I told hubs how sorry I was to have spent so much money on frivolous things when we moved into this house. I see all the stuff being put into boxes to be taken away and wish with all my heart one of you bloggers who loves my style were here to give it to. It's been brutal to see all this stuff go to others but I'm committed, and once I'm committed there's no turning back. I need to concentrate on reality and reality is those things don't mean as much as peace and freedom and a lifestyle that doesn't try to keep up with the neighbors. I see many bloggers just trying to buy as much as they can to satisfy some thing inside them. I'm becoming not that person. I don't want to be so competitive that I lose focus of what really matters in this world. This is not just lip service, chicks. I'm serious about this. All I need is food, a home to live in, a car to get me where I want or need to go and my hubby and kids. It's been a real revelation realizing this but it is sooooo very true at this time in history.



See that little suitcase on the left? Not the front one but the one in back. It's going.



Also the little one up in the left hand corner on the other side of the living room. It's going also. Truly, I thought I'd be crying but funnily enough, I'm not. It actually feels good to get things out of here. Oh, this is an old photo and the curtains are gone and other very flowery ones are up at the moment. However, I just ordered a pink stripe fabric to redo them yet once again. That will make the 6th pair of curtains I've had in this room. Nothing is ever static around this house.



This etagere is gone already to a friend's house. The vintage school desk is sitting on my front porch ready to be sold on craigslist. If it doesn't sell soon, I'll put it around on the back patio for the winter and try again next spring.

As I sit here today struggling with all the things I'm getting rid of a few thoughts have occurred to me. Okay, okay, more than a few, but I'm being nice—thousands of thoughts have gone through my head today, not the least of which is: Why in the world do I take hubby grocery shopping with me? I can't for the life of me figure out why.



My whole life has changed since he retired and has stayed home with me. Okay, "staying home" isn't quite accurate as he does a lot of things for our church, the VFW, the Marine Corps League and teaches several classes a month on real estate. (The latter job is a requirement from me to him to help me keep my sanity.) But the thing I'm most perturbed about is grocery shopping.



My opinion is that men simply do NOT understand the psychology of shopping but specifically 'grocery shopping'. We women follow a set of unspoken rules of which men have not been aware since the beginning of time.



Today while shopping he again hangs on to the cart trying to direct me around people. I have been grocery shopping for us for over 50 years now and I think I'm qualified to handle a grocery cart without being thrown out of Wal-Mart. He won't let me pass them, pushes the cart with an iron grip and tells me to watch out for other people. For crying out loud, I'm nice!! I've never hit anyone, smile all the time at my fellow women and men shoppers and actually, on a regular basis, let them go around me by getting out of their way.



Then, there's the 'putting the item in the cart' business. He just grabs an item off the shelf, not noting that it isn't the regular item/brand I buy and then organizes it in the cart ever so carefully. I just toss it in. Yes, of course, there's an organization to MY putting things in the cart but he makes it a science and that takes two to three times longer. I get frustrated and just start pushing the cart away. I don't crush bread or fresh items but I don't take near as long. Bottom line: I want to do my shopping alone from now on and not worry about saving a few pennies with a brand I don't like. (I'm NOT going into the argument we had over Del Monte versus Heinz ketchup today.)



The checkout stand is entirely another issue. We women understand how to 'get it done' without being obnoxious but certainly being assertive—at least I do. I'm assertive without being obnoxious. I start loading on the belt as soon as there is a bit of room and negotiate my cart a bit to the right of the person so I can load the bags into it asap. Mr. Love Bunny, or Happy-To-Shop-Man, doesn't let me do what I need to do. He's giving me the evil eye and pushing the cart back. I tell ya, I just want to POP him!!!! I am never ugly or mean to people! I know how to shop leisurely and graciously without offending anyone! Truly, I do. The only thing I want him to do is carry the groceries in. So I just may have to go shopping alone from now on.



It's off my chest now. Well, that is, but there will be more shortly. Trust me on this.

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Went Shopping and Pink Saturday 8/15/09

I went shopping several days ago and found these gorgeous pink froufrou feather/down pillows that go perfectly with my walls, living room sofa and curtains. Squeeeeeeeal. I cannot believe that I first thought I could live without them. I must have had a lapse of memory or something, chicks!

And how about this darling little plate?!! It says: "I never met an indulgence I didn't like." My motto..........okay, ONE of my mottos! I have many, ya know.

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Dinner at a restaurant the other night resulted in a discussion with the waiter about flying and I said I didn't fly anymore and he said he hated it also. He said with all the plane crashes he just didn't like to fly and then asked me why I hated flying now. I simply told him I've never fallen 50,000 ft. out of a Toyota Camry. He understood that perfectly.
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Shopping in San Francisco

My favorite place in the whole world to shop: San Francisco Union Square! It just doesn't get much better than this for regular normal people. Hah. I borrowed these from Mo with her permission because when we moved here from the Bay Area digital cameras were not on the market then and I was one of the worst photographers ever. My skills have improved greatly since then! So thank you to Mo and a gift is making its way to her door as we speak!

This is standing on one corner looking at the Westin St. Francis Hotel. I love to dine here. They have a few dining rooms at which to eat and we've eaten at each one I think. But the one I love most is right inside the entrance. They have sofas at some of the tables in the middle of the room, not those banquettes along the walls. Very elegant. And the staff is exceptional.

We took a friend's teenager back with us one year for the holidays because she was struggling in the small Idaho town we were in at that time. She was mesmerized! She couldn't believe such a place existed. She then looked at me as we were reading the menu in the front of the restaurant and said, "Connie, you're going to have to translate the menu for me because I don't understand a word of it." I did because it was all in french.

Neiman-Marcus. Wheat else can I say. The last time I was in here several years ago I was in the linen department and looking at some pure linen sheets. One sheet - not a set, but just one sheet - was $400.00. I've never slept on pure Irish linen sheets and at that price I'm probably not going to if Love Bunny has his say about it. I'm sure the sheets must last a lifetime though as linen is a very sturdy fabric. (He isn't buying that one, chicks! Hah) One of the most elegant stores I've been in outside of Hollywood's Rodeo Drive.

My favorite store in the whole world - Macy*s! I've been in many of them but this one on Union Square has 4 floors I believe and a basement. Dining is a real treat as the food is superb. But if you can't find it here then it probably doesn't exist in the world. And when they have a sale, it's a sale! I once bought an $80 blouse (this was 25 years ago) for $10.00. This place wants to move their merchandise, ladies! Wonderful place to shop, just fantastic!!!!

The Westin St. Francis up close. I cannot tell you how gracious the staff is in this hote. They see to your every need with the utmost care.

Nordstroms. I love their shoes. They originally started out as a shoe store in Seattle and then expanded. The S.F. store was put in about mid 1980s I believe and when we went in there you gasped it was so lovely. Glass escalators - which actually was a bit frightening to me because of the heights. I cannot begin to describe the beauty of this store. It kind of feels like you're in a gold mine with all the gold and glitter. And the employees are very attentive to your every whim. You do NOT need to ask for help; they're right there helping you. Their staff is also as exceptional as the St. Francis.